Next time you're hunched over your Bubblegum
Crisis mousepad designing a level, think to yourself: what would Art Frahm do? If the
answer is, make the only entrance to the boss of the sewer's office - the one the boss
himself would have to use - through a long hall filled with giant pointless rotating gears
that crush things on contact, don't do it! It's idiotic and Art Frahm already did it
better than you. Under the harsh light of logical deconstruction, he proved that
it's okay for the the emperor to have no clothes - if the emperor is a hot chick.
All you're going to prove is that the naked emperor of the gloomy cave is an imbecile.
Hit the "undo" button and think harder. That's also a trick
question, because you're not supposed to be making a sewer level anyway. Back to the
drawing board, jackass.
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Even one more thing I don't like about Rune is this character from The Norseman:
I feel just as bad about the way blacks have been treated
as anyone. If there was I a way I could make reparations - say by annexing Quebec
and giving every African American family three French Canadian slaves - I'd do it. I
firmly believe that both Jesus and Jennifer Lopez are black. But for God's sake, the
one place where I think all of us can get behind a strict whites-only policy is the casts
of Viking movies.
Here's
another shot of Ke-Shawn Porvaldr. This is an outrage to whites and blacks
alike. I'm gonna play the odds here and say it probably upsets feminists too.
Hi folks, Lee Majors again. That's a picture of me
and the colored fella to the right there. When we were filming The Norseman,
sometimes on my way home to see my wife Farrah Fawcett Majors, I'd stop at a bar.
Mind you, this was in the days before she left me. Before you might pull up to find her
squattin' over your front lawn takin' a crap. Anyway, I'd ask the bartender if he
could make me a Black Viking. He'd ask, well what's in that. I'd say, well ya
take two parts vermouth, one part soda and mix it all up in a unicorn horn. He'd
say, Lee, there's no such thing as a unicorn. I'd tell him, well that's okay cause
there ain't no such damn thing as a black viking. The Norseman didn't do so good.
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